Back to my personal topic, so from the information that i perceive in the world, where i should go? If i ignore what my heart told me, and follow my logic, i would be likely walk in the path of technology, e-commerce for example as combination between business activity and information technology or boldly take website developer since everyone will need them in year ahead. However, it would lead me back to the disappointment, of what i have experienced for 4 years walking in the wrong direction, leave me in suffering and negative mind toward life since the principle of major i took does not relate with my personal value. It based on someone opinion and at that time i have no idea where is my career would be, the good side about this job enable me to get the job easily than the specific major one. I have tried warehousing, sales and finance and all have its own point.
I am not disappointed though i also learn some stuff in the way, every knowledge is important. Still, i could be better if i know my ideal career. Currently i work on it and every new option to consider should pass these criteria:
Passion
If it does not resonate with my heart, it share different value for my principle, therefore i will decline the major since it is not my passion.
Talent
Talking about intelligent, the strong point which distinguish the quality between other, the gift from the above which is powerful if it used wisely.
Personality
Do i have the quality to perform well, how is my endurance toward rejection or waiting, do i consider myself adaptable, can i work with different background of people, and the list going much. This point is important to maximize the two point stated above. I always remember from the psychologist directly that this can be changed patiently by given plenty of time teaching myself.
Value
I consider this is the most important point to keep my performance consistent and help me to come back if i ever fail. What is my value hold into? Do i envisage world as a competitive field, who the best will win and collecting wealth to be my personal goal?, or to die in honor by serving faithfully to country or humanity and everyone will remember his name?, or making someone life better from what you are doing.
So this is my spectrum of calling version, it inspires from other reference to which has the same idea with it, given by 4 different characteristic of your ideal job, you need to love it (passion), you are great in it (talent), you are paid for it (monetize), and the world need it (mission). So what i have been working right now it to filter the prospective major i want to study in Canada later so here comes the graph.
I share equally the Passion and Talent value as they remain static, i can never change what already discover in my Passion, the list grow as i find another interesting stuff i love to doing for. However, i could turn off my Passion of something happen between it and i refuse to take any further action. For example when i was young, my mom told that i enthusiast to playing with dangerous stuff, electric cables is my friend and one day i got shocked from it and starting from that day i refuse to play with the stuff again but my curiosity has not changed. The factor underline to why i am not playing football and rather play with ridiculous stuff is because my curiosity.
One day, there is intelligent test in my primary school and the test result is good, my IQ consider as smart in average of 126 but this is contradictory with my study, most of my marks were under perform and consider myself as rebel, i hate following the lesson not because my capability does not enough so it bring me to frustration but because i am not interested with it. I hate to memorize lesson i consider useless but i attract with sport science and this lead me into the Kinestetics study type.
I seek personal escape through activity after class such as football or computer games, i can get easily addicted to the new games and since i was good at sport, i enjoy football. So if i could summed up what i love to do in my childhood, i am good at any activity that involve physically.
In my middle high to high school, my mark remain same, always under perform regardless how high my IQ is. Later i learn that even i could absorb the study material quickly, i easily given up if the subject does not excites me coupled with severe procrastination. I tend to finish stuff in short period of time (last minute study), which make my work mostly unprepared and unprofessional. My daily has not change since primary school since the time i enjoyed the most is after school period, by playing football and computer game.
I remembered in high school I ever join a church activities, which i voluntarily work as multi media operator, the entrance test was making one minute video using video editor software, and later on everyone got accepted since the position are hard to find the candidates. It was my first time working individually and the activity i most enjoyed is not about the result of my work, instead of how i plan of how my video supposed to be. If everyone were busy with the stuff i consider not interested, i plan it with every detail i could find, the selection and harmony of sound effects, the sequence transition, the element of lights in emotion, which excite my brain to the most but back to my weakness, i spend too much for planning and when it comes to execution, i got confused from where to start.
In this story, it shows that i love to plan but not to execute, i love to draw the chart and calculate the outcomes so i could say that i am a good planner and analyze but bad to follow up with my plan. Planning is not same with organize since plan only happen before the time frame while organizing is keep the plan works consistently from the beginning until the end.
This came up with my first major project in my life, that the senior member in multi media division trusted me to do the annual video promotion to attract teenager. The theme is about the time is short for our savior to come, so all sinner shall repent before He comes. I was busy with the planning, i don't want to disappoint my senior and it took all my time and energy, i also use the advance video editing software, after effects. I don't know the reason of why i am doing this but i love the process of learning the software even though is hard to understand in my level. Regardless i have minimum amount of time, i still insist to edit the video using after effects and the result is good, i feel satisfied and proud of myself, my personal mind keep telling i done the job perfectly and i was so happy.
Later i becoming more serious with media and art field, i start learning how to do photo editing tool and graphic creator. This point i felt somewhat stuck, i am good with imagination, my mind project a grandeur plan while my skill could not follow. I am poor at drawing and it leaves me to frustration since it took my time a lot and i still not satisfied enough with my drawing, which is totally different from what my mind think it should be.
This decision stopped my interest toward art, since i enjoy art but unable to creating a good piece of art and the foundation of every art need to be projected into drawing. It takes a lot time and effort to learn how to draw and in this time, my interest toward art is depleting because of my inability to draw. My drawing is getting nowhere to good, the more i put my time to draw i felt such a pressure and my personal logic told me to stop, it ain't worth it so i stopped to draw. I still enjoy any piece of art but i know my own capability that i lack of potential to put my mind picture into reality.
Finish with high school, i have some major in mind and during that time, i want to take animation or graphic designer as my first option. My dad told me to be realistic and think it carefully since only few whom perform exceptionally can be success in this field, the degree between the average and success is wide, it is like a death sentence in your career, the average will suffer to fulfill his life and spend rest of his life hard. Another point to mention is this major is popular for those who is average, doesn't have any chance to take challenge field as medicine or law since they need to be smart academically so the option left for them is Art. Some people take this major for fun or don't know where they are going so in the next period of year this job supply would be abundant, and they will suffer from the fierce competition among job seeker.
The other job that i mention is Information Technology, i don't know why this job seems interested for me, by given the difficulty and many person whom i know told me that the road of this path should be tough, you will lose your young time focusing on your study and the development of the field is quick, which require you to be adaptable. My dad background was IT and he keep saying the same thing, i bet something horrible happen to him since right now he leaving his job and becoming an entrepreneur.
The only two options that left for me, i still don't know for other as i am not exploring the other deeply, leave me no option but following my dad opinion to study in Business major.
The experience was good in the beginning as i love the theory of economy and learn it fast, but when it comes to the practical stuff, i given up. It seems like i was lack of courage to start a business or start something, i need someone who opened a path for me to execute my planning process into reality.
In my first year, i joined a student community for my personal experience with organization since i never join any active organization which i can contribute to the school community. I was greeted by member of the organization and later i want to participating in making an event. My first event was a Christmas party, when it comes just one week after i got accepted in the union. My first job was to promote the event through the school and later i do the decoration since we lack of decoration team. The whole event was a big success and later we want to have another event, and the leader appoint some people to organize the event, and it was another success. Most of the coworker told that i have a good insight of planning every stuff in detail, and i was proud of myself to be able to contribute for their success.
If i could refer about my favorite subject in my major, it was Operation management. The reason behind it is simple, i like the way of teacher taught us with friendly approach and reasonable information. I felt that i am into this subject, regardless of executing is my worst type of job, the subject of operation management require lot of analysis on how product should be manufactured and delivered efficiently and quickly by reducing the process and waiting time, to analyze the cost of time and product in given statistical data and lots of chart. In this point, i suddenly realize that i love to analyze.
This take me to my first internship in trading company and i apply as the warehouse staff in the company but it turned bad. I learn nothing but repetitive process of data entry, what i supposed to learn for two months i completed it in three days, i only interested with how they create the warehouse system through excel and the method of payment. I expect more as i learn how to efficiently distribute the cargo in limited space of warehouse or the period of time on how the good entered to the warehouse until it arrived to destination. So i escape from the data entry stuff and i know they think i am a rebel, but i try to save my time there to do a productive stuff, i travel around the city to know the local wholesale and their price.
My second internship was better, even i work as a sales which gradually need to input the email contacts to their database, they also give me the chance work with their marketing team to do a research in prospective countries. I could perform better in this type of job but only one stuff which makes me want to leave the intern sooner is because i should finish my paperwork before May.
Currently i stuck in my job with no career prospect, while my mind completely matured in my mid-late change my view on how i see the world. I tried as much as i can, the stuff that i ever want to try and some of them work wonder. I realize i love to helping others, i feel such an accomplishment once i was able to help people. Before, i try to write the plan although i never done it, just the first part, takes me to the world of writing. I just got sudden realization that i am into writing and once i write, i will never stop writing. I should learn how to writing effectively since my writing sometimes out of topic and keeping tell the same stuff over and over again with difference emphasize.
In conclusion, my passion traits lies into this activity; Any activity that requires physical, planning something, analyze by given data and helping others. I may not discover other traits right now but eventually this will have a responsible part to be my career decision.
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